What is your type?

Had a wonderful conversation with some friends of Qin during the busy week. Well less than a quarter of the conversation was regarding the assignments and the rest of it was about something, anything and everything under the sun.

Out of a sudden, not really out of the sudden, the topic regarding relationship took the center stage. Consider me being lucky, there was 5 girls and 2 guys (including me) was on that table chatting. I was fascinated what those girls said; it is not like you will hear a lot of it from the place I came (even if I do hear from the girls, it is a very rogue presentation of the topic…plainly no elaboration)

This time however was different. This bunch of girls talks about almost every single detail of their exes and their currents. Sad fact of human nature, when a girl compares against all the boys she ever dated, then they start comparing to other girls which gives you an equation of heated debate; during winter and outdoor. It was rather peculiar the way the girls compared, therefore I remain silent and watch the ‘movie’, just say I do not want to get scratched by any cat fights.

After all that was over, one of those girls pop this question
Girl : What is your type?
e2e : (with a very blur looking face) Huh, what do you mean?
Girl : What type of girl do you like lar?
e2e : (what’s with the ‘lar’ for, I do not think you Koreans use ‘lar’) Erm…ish...
Girl : …………..
e2e : (took out my small booklet) give me your email and your phone number, when I got the answer, I call you….write your name too while you are there.

I was too busy to think what type of girl attract me, but the very obvious few attributes goes to pretty face, curvy body, nice boobs, tight looking ass and must be shorter than me was initially drawn upon in my crappy brain. But how wrong was I, once this crappy brain begins to think for the first time in……I can’t remember when the last time was.

A clearer picture of ‘The Girl’ was clear…crystal.

Even though, I found the answer, I did not call her nor did I email her. Why!! You may ask. The answer is plainly simple, she is not ‘The Girl’ (ok I lied, I am a coward…so sue me).

What is your type?

The answer is simple;

1 Preferably a homey person; will literally wait for you at home for your return asking how your day was and end with a warm hug (and kisses)

2 Independent yet dependent on you (get the meaning?)

3 Willing to sit on the couch doing nothing besides cuddling like kids.

4 Must not be emotionally depress (when she have nothing better to do) when she starts thinking of bizarre scenarios.

5 Will not bug the living hell out of you when you are really busy, having a good time out with friends, watching football and F1.

6 Will talk to you her problems but not drool over it for weeks (to some extend days)

7 Someone who do little special thinks just for you instead of waiting for you to do it.

8 To give moral support when having a hard time with anything I am doing.

9 Someone to share my joy, laughter and warm with.

10 To be the empress of my dream palace and country, not forcing it to be real (though it is possible to some degree)

11 Most important; able to cook.

Let make it more interactive, dear readers; friends and those whom I am yet to know and meet, what is your type of girl or guy you wish to be your significant other?

Update on the un-updated

First of all, the busy week has come and gone, what left is the exam month *sigh*

Besides completing the assignments, did nothing productive because playing free MMORPG. I know, the exam period is near, but I need a break…right, just a little bit of time for relaxation; killing monsters and players, not to mention being killed.

The freaking assignments and of course the fun of killing ‘things’ have occupied too much time which has branded me a product called No Life. I miss chatting with people over the internet (guess you all know why I did not reply) and porn (HL stop asking me!!)

Things just can’t be better; the world cup is around the corner and the same with exams where both falls right on the same month and time; this going to really exciting.

By the end of June, a vacation is definitely certain; a celebration to the end of student life (hopefully) and also a gala for the new unemployed citizen of Malaysia (praying for it not to happen).

If I would to fail any subjects in this final semester, it does not mean I am stupid neither does it mean I did not study, it all means one thing; I was born intelligent, education ruined me.

Week 12 aka Busy Week

Finally found some time to do more personal stuff.

For this week, life will not be the same again; like every other semester’s week 12.

Monday – because of this day, my weekends were ruined. Why the hack the freaking lecturer need set the dateline of the assignment on Monday? Why can’t she have it on any other days of the week?

After the lecture, I went home immediately to continue the marketing plan editing. The best part of it all, I spent 2 hours calculating and formulating the budget of the marketing plan. It should be very easy if you pluck those figures from thin air. But, as a perfectionist barbarian, I wanted the figures for the budget resemble as closely to real life instead of being a figment of imagination. After getting the budget out of the way, I have 33 pages thick worth of words to be edited and formatted not even including another 4 pages of appendixes. Cut the matter short, I slept at around 6.15 am when the sun rises. I may choose to sleep earlier, as the weather was very inviting for a good night sleep, however this plan need to be submitted by Thursday!!!

Tuesday – with very little sleep the 12pm class felt like a torture. Least to say, there was a group meeting after that because this particular subject’s assignment due on Friday. What irritates me the most is the fact that my group members have no bloody idea what to do with the available data (like I have all the ideas for it!!!)

For now, I will have my long awaited dinner (read: first meal of the day) before continuing the onslaught of the assignments. Niece you are right, this week is indeed busy and I love you.

The Regret

It was very devastating for the past night as this untrained crappy brain thought of only one thing; the fact of which making me regret for not doing.

It was the usual after class dinner with Mason on a not so cold Thursday evening. Went to the usual food court, ate the usual dish and drank the usual drink (boring eh….good). When I was ¾ done eating, Mason’s food arrived, the cook in counter 11 is freaking slow despite there was hardly any customers ordering from that counter unlike counter 8 (the one which I always order my food from)

While waiting for Mason to chow down his dinner, I have the pleasure of waiting and watching people walking around the food court. Suddenly it struck my eyes; a cute little thing was ordering her food from counter 1. She was kind of short, thin, flat in the front and back but she was cute (read: ugly but adorable) and the best part; the crappy brain thinks she is a Korean.

There I was observing her actions, about a few minutes later I told Mason to turn behind. Well he turned, looked and then started to tell all those attributes that the particular girl lacks and what he thinks is the perfect girl…for him. After all those annoying details of his perfect girl attributes, 1 word from me shut him up; so.

She was seating there all alone eating her dinner, the crappy brain ask me to go to her table, the legs felt uneasy, my hands was sweaty, the heart was pumping like mad but my ass chose not to move. The whole ecosystem within me was working really well, since I am chick depressed for months, but the ass got to ruin the whole system by remain seated on the chair.

Minutes later, we walked out of the food court. What happen next was just another piece of history of cursing and whining about my big fat ass.

Wise Words

"Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own unguarded thoughts."

Hmm...very deep

Anyone suffered from that?

Dear niece,

Well rushing for time now, life can be a lot better if those dam assignments are easier. All this thinking and analysing making me go bald before even turning 30-ish.

Finally niece decides to drop me a comment, thank you so much.

I knew niece long time ago (she is my niece right, go figure how long) of course thanks to her mama and papa to bring her into this world and making my day more or less miserable depending on her mood. For the matter of fact, she always (read: forever) being sarcastic and rude towards me. For the record, I have not done anything wrong to her or even dare to hurt her; she so fierce makes me very scared because do not want to die so young. I really have no idea why she treats me that way, btw niece; why you always treat me like that?

Besides that, since college she has been bugging me to do my assignments and studies, even till now; separated by 8.5 hours on plane. Never once she bugs me go yumcha, watch a movie, lunch, snooker, pool, smoke and fetch her home (actually I am quite ok with the fact she did not ask me to fetch her home). Honestly, my mom does not even ask about assignments or even try asking me to study since started college (not at home most of the time). I guess, niece just slipped into the role, may be because she is older than me by 363 days and thinking that she have control over her uncle.

Anyway you still sound like a Malay and definitely look lesser than a Malay now since you chose to hibernate in the office during the holidays and giving tons of silly excuses not to go out…with me. I am positively sure that you have gone down some weight, making your legs like chicken feet (and I hate chicken feet…yuck). I know during my 1st Aussie adventure many things happen and I was not there to hear your complaining on every single detailed facts of it. Well I assume now, since so long it has passed, is the best time for you to put on some pounds or else you are too boney; very the scary ya know, like a walking skeleton.

Depressing to say, I miss you niece. How nice if you are by my side right now, so that I could do all those nonsense that you hated so much. On the other hand, you can and may pick on me with your special weapon…nagging. It is a win-win situation; do not even think about it.

My mother....

When I was 14, my mom quitted her job to take care of me; do not get it wrong, I am not crippled. It was during this time I joined the wrong company of people and did many things which are of course wrong. She sacrificed her time making money into spending time making a son she once knew and hope for.

Her hardness on me gives very limited space for me to do almost anything, in other words, ultimately controlled, even up to a point I need to be home in 30 minutes after school. The consequence of being late is sadly quite dire; tested and proven. It did not take long for me to comprehend my mistakes; after tons of scolding, grounding and shouting.

One fine day, while having a drink after school (it was the second last day of SPM, give me a break) with couple of guys and of course smoking, something struck me real hard. I would like to call it my mini enlightenment from the realization of what my mom has taught me;

1) To be thankful, remember the good deeds of a person of which did onto you.
2) To sacrifice, service above self.
3) To love once more, the unconditional love the parents have given to him.
4) To obey silence, shut up before dad gets angry.
5) To practice patients, never to give up

Suddenly, I rushed home (because my eyes started to tear and do want to be call a wuss among my friends) only to find my mom waiting for my return. She looked worried, sad to say I was like 15 minutes late from the restricted time. Instead of getting one hack of a scolding, she did not, she was worried sick. I gave her a hugged and assured her everything is great and of course the exam was great too. That was the last time I say her worried face; considering the fact of all the late nights yumcha-ing and speeding on the highways since started college.

My mom; my life, my teacher, my guardian, my main source of knowledge that no books teach or tell, thank you so much.

I may not be the best son there is neither am I being the son that you really hope to have. All this while I tried to please you as much as I could, no doubt some of the methods were stupid and annoying and some of it resulted into more scolding from you. There is one thing left for me to say, I did my best and I hope you are proud of me.

You used to believe in the things I do, but you lost that believe because it is my fault. It took sometime thereafter, but now you believe in me and I thank you for that. Anyone on the street can and may replace me as your son, but you may not be substituted by any mother on the street.

Mom...I love you...happy mother’s day.

Your son.

The Altar

My very first exposure to the altar comes when I was really young. Did not know much about it except dad always put little cups filled with water and tea every morning and make short prayers and joss offerings twice a day. Situated in the middle of the altar was a statue, dad say it is the Buddha. My question is, why do we pray to the statue and not the real person, I got very confuse.

As I grew, I started to hate the altar; may be because every time I get punished, I am required to squat in front and facing it until my parents anger subsided. Well things did not turn better, my dad enforces me to do prayers every morning and night, which includes; serving tea and water, cleaning it and joss offerings. The truth, I hated it, why can’t he ask mom or bro to do it, why it got to be me just because I am the eldest son or is it something else. But then, I have no choice, either I do it or get one hack of a scolding, tested and proven many times over those years.

The hatred for the altar lasted for almost 10 years. The hatred subsided since I started Sunday school many years ago and mixing with knowledgeable adults in Buddhism of which mom and dad encourages a lot. It begun from a lot of questioning, which dad always disagrees with my questions. Later it became somewhat a practice of reading up books regarding Buddhism. Not too long ago, my knowledge on Buddhism surpasses those of mom and dad.

I no longer hate doing those routine that dad enforces on me, I guess deeper understanding helped me to relieve and realize the negative misunderstanding towards the altar. For the past few years, I been doing that routine almost everyday, it is no longer a hated command but a habit. About 2 years ago, I started reciting long prayers; verses that dad do not even know off, and also doing meditation; not an expert yet…still very far away.

As far as I can remember, the main altar consists of a Buddha, Kuan Yin, Guan Gong and 2 Luang Phor Tot statues. For the past 3 years, the number of statues increased at a tremendous rate. Bro used to tell his friends that the house is very scary; this is because almost all of the statues are gold plated (gold colour, never was there gold) which it is quite a creepy sight after all the lights are off which leaves only the candle light brightness located on the altar. Do not blame me; I did not buy any of it, put it short, thank you mom.

Today is Wesak day; the day that commemorates the birth, the enlightenment and the passing of Gautama Buddha; no more than just a mere teacher.

From the depth of my hearth;
I offer flowers; the nature of impermanence,
I offer candle light; the light of wisdom,
I offer perfume; the significance of perseverance or joyous effort,

A rip off from Wikipedia;
The Buddha Himself has given invaluable advice on how to pay homage to Him. Just before He died, He saw His faithful attendant Ananda, weeping. The Buddha advised him not to weep, but to understand the universal law that all compounded things (including even His own body) must disintegrate. He advised everyone not to cry over the disintegration of the physical body but to regard His teachings (The Dhamma) as their Teacher from then on, because only the Dhamma truth is eternal and not subject to the law of change. He also stressed that the way to pay homage to Him was not merely by offering flowers, incense, and lights, but by truly and sincerely striving to follow His teachings. This is how devotees and expected to celebrated Vesak: to use the opportunity to reiterate their determination to lead noble lives, to develop their minds, to practise loving-kindness and to bring peace and harmony to mankind.

A little loving kindness won’t hurt….

May dear readers, be well and happy,
May they be free from harm, free from enmity,
May they be free from suffering, hatred and grudges,
May they dwell in peace and harmony,
May His wisdom shine upon them.

I may have hated you once; that is my ill will. I may have not liked you before; that is my ignorance. I may have misunderstood you; that is my delusion. I came to ask and investigate; you taught and guided me with your Dhamma, and I thank you for that.

Sadhu, Sadhu, Sadhu

Stupid................me

When you thought getting pushed around was bad enough, the worse is yet to come. Let’s say, stupid things happened in a time frame of 5 hours is more than enough compared to getting pushed.

It all started in a very cold afternoon; I was in the ICF tutorial class waiting for the result paper being handed out. Well my name was somewhere down the list making it the almost last name to be called upon; I swear it was the shortest 10 minutes of my life.

Browsing through the paper…….gawd there were so many silly mistakes; mistakes that caused big time marks deduction, well at least it explains the 48/100. Another thing for sure, I am stupid.

After class, went for lunch with Will-I-am and we started chatting all the ridiculous stuff about relationship. Then something stupid got to come out from my mouth…

e2e: Man have you thought of cheating?
Will-I-am: You siaw arr…if cheat also the max I get is 2 girls in a year. For her, can have different guys a week leh.
e2e: …………..

One thing for sure, never cheats when your girlfriend is able to get more guys as compared to you getting girls, definitely not suitable for security reasons or any other reasons.

Fast forward a few hours later;

Finally time to go home, got on to the bus at the station and for not particular reason an old man in his sixties got to stand beside my seat. The school boy on the other seat can easily offer the old man his seat but no, the school boy did not. He completely ignore the sign “Student empty seats for adults”. To clear some confusion, I am a university student; therefore I should vacate the seat. However, the prepaid bus ticket states that I am an adult. Nonetheless as an educated barbarian, I stood up and offer the seat. Did I mention that the journey took 45 minutes?

Bum Bum Bum

First of all I would like to say, good job to myself for being such a bum, went through 3 consecutive unproductive days; a great job well done with the obvious having an exam on Monday *sigh*.

Well you might ask, WTH you did in those 3 days?

The answer is very simple, all I did was sleep, eat, shit, watch anime, play dota and definitely no revisions. It was great weekend, time to chill and relax doing almost nothing fruitful, how can one ask for more.

Second thing to mention, when I took the ICF exam about a month and the half ago, finally the results were out. Prepared to face the consequences, as always, for doing a wonderful screwed job for the paper, I opened the grade book expecting nothing more than a fail and wishing it to be best of the failing people, things got a little harsh though…48/100…I was unable to be the worst of the worst; what a failure. How am I going to explain to everybody that has high hopes on me to be the worst?

Thirdly, the champions league final is around the corner, too bad over here they do not show that match same goes with the world cup; can you imagine the sadness that I need to go through. On the side note, Arsenal is going to win it no matter what, unless if you think otherwise, if you do, please leave a simple comment.

Besides the champions league, who do you think will be the top 4 countries in the world cup or which country will win it…Germany?

Well my pick for this feature of world cup; Brazil, Argentina, Germany and England. What do you think?

Pushed

Well getting pushed around is not fun unless you are the pusher. I have never felt so easily pushed around as far as this crappy brain can remember. Just imagine something like this happening 3 times in the space of 10 hours. Mere coincidence, I guess not.

It all started as a sunny, cooling and breezy day while having so much fun (read: shits) doing the assignment, then…..

Niece came online, since I am her uncle, it will be right to have a short chat with that lovely girl. Well the chat was short, really short, all in all…less than 5 minutes. I asked about her dog in the pic, her reply, “Its my dog anyway...she's wet cuz after bath... put her on the chair to dry her... anyway... do ur assignment uncle...ciow”. That is the only reply from her. Hack, I am your uncle, show some respect please. It do not take a genius to know that one day I will go to a land far, far, far away. So dear niece, chat with me while you still can before I lay 6 feet under, stop thinking of fuzzy, think of me; thinking of me brings joy…period. And please stop asking me to do my assignments!!!

Few hours later, I took a bus to uni of which it is darn late, luckily made it on time with 5 minutes to spare. As usual, I would sit right at the back and will slowly drift to dreamland, but not today. Today is a special day, hand in assignment day, but it did not go smoothly. My group member printed the wrong stuff, therefore JY and I rushed to the computer labs to make some amendments and print the correct stuff of which took about 15 minutes to get it done, finally our master piece was ready for submission. As I entered the class, some idiot got to sit at my place, is he that blind that he cannot see my bag and utensils all laid to perfection on the table; that bugger really need to open his eyes. Consequently, I moved to another table, right in front of the class, the taboo 1st row of tables. DAMM YOU ANG MO!!!

When you thought things cannot get any worse, take my word, do not underestimate it.

Went for a quick bite with Mason after class somewhere near uni, then it happen again. On the side note, the cashier was rather cute. As a civilized barbarian, I waited ever patiently for my turn to make some orders. When it was my turn, things got a little out of control;

Cashier: Good day sir, how can I help you?
e2e: I would like a cheeseburger set tagged with you on it.
Cashier: **smiled**….that will be $5.25 sir.
e2e: Hey, would you care to join me for a quick bite? I promise would not bite hard.
Cashier: I am so sorry, I can’t join you…I am working.
e2e: Quit your job, I am more fun than that.
Cashier: **smiling while packing my orders**….here you go sir….NEXT!!!

Wise Words; Meaning Unknown.....Yet

In what is seen, there should be just the seen;
In what is heard, there should be just the heard;
In what is sensed, there should be just the sensed;
In what is thought, there should be just the thought.

WTH do it mean?

Anyone out there can tell me, my crappy brain isn’t functioning well of late thanks to the piles of assignments and bunch of things to do.

Just drop me a comment on what it means, if you are up for the challenge or feeling to darn freaking bored what to do with life.